I actually really like Tuesdays this semester; I have my drawing and BFA exhibition classes, and I have time to work on stuff without having to worry about waking up at the crack of dawn to get ready for work.
But today is not a good day. After a weekend of work combined with meetings combined with fitting in drawing whenever I could and trying to finish a slow moving first draft of the first of three short stories for my writing class this semester, I woke up with a bad feeling. It was doom, or some sense of it.
I don't know if it's the prospect of Valentine's Day next week, or the fact I won't be able to visit my parents over the weekend like I'd hoped (my birthday is Saturday). It might be both these things plus my stressing over waiting for a studio space plus the paper I should have gotten about four weeks ago. And the fact that I set up my BFA show on Easter Sunday. I try not to look at it in the sense that everything is working against me this semester, but it's really hard not to.
All I know is that when this song came on my iPod, closely followed by this one, I really had to try not to start bawling my eyes out. I hate getting overly emotional about stuff; I can hardly stand being around myself. It's like my rational side puts up with the comforting one for only so long, and then all I want to do is tell myself to get a grip and then just walk away and get a cup of Earl Grey to calm my nerves.
Perhaps I should try doing just that. Hmm.
P.S. - "Slow Me Down" by Emmy Rossum, for your Tuesday.
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